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Santa Monica, Hot Flash, Dating

The Weekly Hot Flash: Dating Tips For Over 50s

Barbara Bishop, Columnist
Santa Monica Mirror Archives
Barbara Bishop, Columnist

Posted Jan. 23, 2014, 8:30 am

Barbara Bishop / Hot Flash Columnist

I’m married. Usually happily. But if I wasn’t, where does a woman over 50 who looks more like 40, that is attractive, successful, financially stable, a great cook, well-traveled, funny, semi-athletic, spiritual, an animal-lover, generous, and well-connected find their soul mate? (What, a little too specific?)

When I was in my 20s, I found my “soul mates” in bars with my friends. Now, I am asleep by 9 pm. Those bars don’t even open until 10 pm! When I was in my 30s, gyms were the thing. But I got tired of grunting, smelly guys lifting weights to show off their weirdly built bodies and then slither past me to try to strike up a conversation. Now I get my exercise from walking my dog, weight training two days a week, and yoga 1-2 days a week. Not many guys in that mix.

I’ve been married for more than 20 years. When I was in my 40s, I would fix up my girlfriends with newly divorced men. Usually didn’t work out. Too many kids, to much in alimony payments, crazy x-wives, and swore they will never get married again. Baaaggage!

So what about the well-preserved woman over 50? I have several friends in the category.  They are stunning, successful, and have little to no physical or emotional baggage. I did a little research for them and found the top five dating sites for the finely aged woman.   Here are the top sites, as rated by Nancy, Simi, Leslie, Cyndi, Sue, Cathy, Jeannette, help is on its way!

What I found is that women or men over 50 seeking relationships have countless options online, with many eligible singles looking for love.

The majority of over 50 singles are choosing to join online dating sites so they can benefit from the advanced features and premium service that only online options can offer. It has taken the place of traditional “off line” dating services and dating agencies, helping to make it easier than ever to meet other mature singles.

Voted Number 1 - Zoosk

More than just a dating website, is an “online dating community.” This dating site offers a more personalized experience in dating, using smart technology to pair you with people you’re likely to click with. Lots of couples have met, fallen in love, dated, gotten married and/or started a family using Zoosk. For your personalized experience, visit

Voted Number 2 - offers a plethora of search options so that you can identify potential matches based on the criteria that are important to you. The site offers keyword searching as well as customized searching, through which you can narrow down your options based upon qualities like marital status, political views, salary range, astrological sign or even eye-color. They offer a six-month guarantee that you’ll find “someone special.” Find that special someone by visiting

Voted Number 3 - OurTime

OurTime is an online dating website geared toward singles over the age of 50 who are looking for all types of relationships, including marriage, travel or companionship.. The website, a sister company to, launched in 2011 after the company extensively researched the preferences of older people looking for companionship online. Since its launch, OurTime has grown to become one of the top online dating sites catering to a more mature population. To find your perfect companion, go to

Voted Number 4 - E-Harmony

E-Harmony sets itself apart from other online dating sites by offering compatibility matching based on its patented 29 Dimensions of Compatibility. These dimensions have helped create long-lasting relationships for over a decade and users still swear by this tried and true method. And with 44,000 member weddings annually (that’s 120 eHarmony weddings a day),  it leaves little question that eHarmony has gotten the personality matching system down to a science.  To find the perfectly compatible partner, go to

Voted Number 5 - How About We

How About We takes a “shoot first” approach to online dating, letting users suggest their ideal dates for other users to browse and accept. This casual approach lends itself to lighthearted fun, decreasing the anxiety usually associated with asking someone out on a date. The site also brings potential matches to you on a daily basis, providing five interesting dates from compatible members. This all means that How About We may be the best site to actually meet and date people in real life as quickly as possible.  To date real life people as quickly as possible, visit

I will be helping my friends look for their true loves over the next few weeks, and report their experiences to you. Stay tuned!

Hot Flash Universe is the go-to source for women over 40 seeking insight into the hottest, most current trends, products, and issues. Topics are approached with candor, intellect, and a healthy dose of humor.

Barbara Bishop is President of Santa Monica-based BBPR, Inc. For comments or suggestions, email

Post a comment


Jan. 24, 2014, 10:44:09 am

lucille kelly said...

I am currently in I believe it is same as Ourtime.,com I am interested in a long term relationship but most of the men seem to want a physical relationship only, which site is best for long term relationships? Thank you......

Jan. 28, 2014, 5:35:45 pm

Rodney Smith said...

If you are male, over 50 move to San Jose.... Costa Rica. Your options are limitless.

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