Golly gee! Howard Dean has been making intemperate remarks again. Why the other day he even suggested that the Republicans don’t fight fair.
Gosh, what an unfair thing to say. He should be ashamed of himself. I mean, we Democrats need to be polite and sweet at all times, don’t we? It has paid off so well for us. Look at all the votes Al Gore and John Kerry garnered by being nice. Not quite enough votes but, by golly, a heck of a lot of them. So we need to tell Howard Dean to button it and be sweet to Karl Rove and Dick Cheney and those guys; after all, they are our leaders and great thinkers and we need to respect the wisdom of their decisions. Risky courageous decisions. Decisions that must be wise because they are so illogical. Why else would leaders do the following?
1. Attack a country that didn’t attack you;
2. Attack a nasty dictator who poses no threat while not attacking those who do pose threats;
3. Decrease tax revenue as expenses are increasing;
4. De-regulate global warming counter-measures as the world’s scientific community warns of global warming;
5. Provide tax benefits to those who don’t need them while increasing tax burdens for those who do need help.
Now, given such seemingly illogical and mean-spirited policies, we must conclude that our leaders know what is best for us and guys like Howard Dean are just creating trouble when they speak out. I mean if something were wrong, then surely our media pundits would speak out. Since they don’t, then we must conclude nothing is wrong. So we need to tell this Dean guy to stop being rude – after all, he runs the risk of hurting the feelings of Rummy, Condi and GWB, and all those sweet, down home-folks we elected.
We Democrats also need to stop carping about the Iraq war. GWB may have changed his reasons for our going to war, but once he and Rummy, et al. decided, our responsibility is to go along. After all, John Kerry understood this, so why doesn’t Howard Dean? It is now clear to all of us that GWB wanted this war. The recently published – in Britain – “Downing Street Memo” makes it clear that Bush made up his mind to take military action long before the U.N. inspectors did their work and that the case for Saddam possessing WMDs was never credible. But our president really wanted this war, and who is Howard Dean and a bunch of sourpuss Democrats to deny him his wishes. After all, LBJ and Daddy Bush got to go to war without Congress so declaring; why shouldn’t Bush Jr. get his undeclared war?
Fair is fair. If our president needs a war to make him happy and to help the pocketbooks of those who paid for him to get elected, then we darn well ought to step in line.
So, even though Howard Dean is acting up, at least our loyal and patriotic members of the press are doing their jobs and reporting what the president’s people tell them is the news. Thus, it is reassuring to learn that things are going so well in Afghanistan and Iraq. Why just the other day Vice President Cheney spoke to our ever-supportive press about the state of the Iraqi resistance movement and reported, “I think they are in the last throes, if you will, of the insurgency.” And the press certainly will.And, just to prove the loyalty of our media – and hence the impoliteness of Dr. Dean – after the (July 2002) “Downing Street Memo,” in which Tony Blair and his associates “learned of a White House effort to fix the intelligence and facts to justify the war in Iraq,” was published in the London Times on May 1, 2005, in the 19 press corps meetings subsequent, two of the 940 questions asked by the White House press corps inquired about the memo (New York Times, 6-12-05). You can hardly buy that kind of loyalty.