I have to wonder if the reason Sarah Silverman is popular is that she’s thin and cute. Or is it because she’s mean? Mean is in, in case you haven’t noticed, on TV, on the web, in print. The user-generated generation, it turns out, has no manners or even a modicum of human decency. What a waste.
Recently, Britney Spears had her so-called comeback on MTV’s Video Music Awards and pretty much sunk her already vanishing career. After the show, when the gossip sites were pointing and laughing at her, splashing unflattering pictures of her and calling her fat, listless and clumsy, Spears was seen sobbing backstage. Part of the trauma was that the idiotic Sarah Silverman had made jokes about Britney’s two children, calling them two of the cutest “mistakes” ever made. And then she made yet another tired joke about Britney’s famous underwear-less photo op. It’s beneath you and me to repeat it here.
Frankly, it’s obscene to watch the lions shred Britney before our eyes. It makes me ashamed to be part of this American life, embarrassed that I partook in reading any of these pointless stories and convinced, finally, that American society has proved that the Romans weren’t alone in their unending hunger to see others flail.
Minutes after her performance aired, an AP story hit the wire about Britney:
“An out-of-shape, out-of-touch Britney Spears delivered what was destined to be the most talked about performance of the MTV Video Music Awards – but for all the wrong reasons. Kicking off the show Sunday night with her new single, “Gimme More,” Spears looked bleary and unprepared – much like her recent tabloid exploits on the streets of Los Angeles.
“She lazily walked through her dance moves with little enthusiasm. It appeared she had forgotten the entire art of lip-synching; and, perhaps most unforgivable given her once taut frame, she looked embarrassingly out of shape.
“Even the celebrity-studded audience seemed bewildered. 50 Cent looked at Spears with a confused expression; Diddy, her new best friend, was expressionless.
“Some comeback.”
Gee, didn’t the AP used to have some respectability?
Much is being made of Spears’ out-of-shape body, and frankly it’s a little much to bear. Is it really such a crime to show up 10 pounds heavier? It must be, because if you’re a female in Hollywood you better be rail thin and you better be the fantasy, dammit. They don’t want reality. We want our goddesses and we want them perfect.
This is not to say that Spears triumphed. The saddest thing about her is that she is convinced the way to go is to sell sex. And why shouldn’t she? After all, isn’t that what we’ve always wanted from her? Clearly Spears still sees herself as the girl she used to be. It’s time to grow up, honey, and put some clothes on.
As for Sarah Silverman, there is no excuse for her embarrassing cruelty. How does she live with herself? I can imagine her reading this and smirking all the way through, patting herself on the back for being a disgusting human being because it was funny. Yeah, that’s it, as long as you’re getting laughs it doesn’t matter what you say.
After a very tiresome evening I’ve decided that I’m too old for MTV at last. It’s a freeing epiphany, because now I can forever turn my back on the cynical, shallow and lifeless joke the music has become. I felt bad for Britney and I wanted to throw a pie in Silverman’s face. I hope both of them eventually get a clue and rise up.
