January 20, 2021 Breaking News, Latest News, and Videos

Palisades Park Personal Trainers Will Work Nude: April Fool’s 2013!

While debate still resonates around the use of Palisades Park by personal trainers, the trainers involved have agreed to conduct their workouts in the nude as a means of giving back to the city.  

Spokesperson for the trainers Divina Narcissus released a press statement.

“The consistently perfect and toned bodies of work out trainers will combine with the natural setting of the park and the ocean to create a tableau of breath-taking beauty rivaling any of our national parks,” the statement read. “Imagine Yellowstone, but with a really tight butt.”

Narcissus pointed out that many of the personal trainers using Palisades Park as a rent-free facility for their businesses have worked as models on the Home Shopping Network and have distributed “important literature” at auto shows.   

“To experience that level of physical exquisiteness unfettered by clothing will be a gift to anyone watching our workouts in the park.  For someone to imply that we’re taking instead of giving…?  Come here.  Touch my arm.  See how it’s like smooth buttery steel?  No, really… enjoy my tawny suppleness.”

For more April Fool’s stories, visit smmirror.com.

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