January 26, 2021 Breaking News, Latest News, and Videos

The Dating Report: Is He Cheating On You?:

Hi Anthea,

I’m worried my boyfriend of five months is cheating on me. Recently I’ve noticed that he never answers the phone or stays on the computer when I’m in the room and he acts really secretive about his whereabouts. How do I find out if he’s cheating? – Ali, 28

Hi Ali,

Thanks so much for your question. First I want to tell you how sorry I am that you are going through this situation. It is awful to feel that you can’t trust the man who is supposed to love you.

There are a few questions to ask yourself to get more clarity on this situation.

First ask yourself is this a pattern for you? Have you felt this way in past relationships? Find out if you are used to looking for proof that a man is not being truthful.

Also, have you ever been cheated on (for sure) before? If so there is possibly some leftover mistrust and resentment from your past relationship that you are bringing into this new relationship.

Lastly, if you don’t trust him then why are you with him? Ask yourself why in a million years would you be with someone who you have any doubts about. It is self-torture to stay in a relationship with someone you can’t trust. It is a huge red flag that something is wrong in the relationship since trust is the main ingredient of a healthy relationship.

Perhaps you are not fully ready to trust and love someone just yet which is totally okay. Try taking some time for yourself to be alone and sort through your core beliefs about men. Journaling and meditation can help. Try completing this sentence in as many ways as possible in order to find your hidden beliefs about men: Men are ________.

If you have a bunch of negative beliefs about men then they will most definitely be proven to be true as you always find what you’re looking for.

Try finding proof about the good qualities in men by looking for them on purpose instead of expecting the negative outcomes. Men really are our heroes if we let them be.

But we can only accept the great qualities in men when we feel we really deserve it. Low self-esteem may be blocking you from getting the love you deserve. For instance if you believe you’re not truly unworthy of love then you will keep attracting men who agree with you and end up mistreating you.

Anthea Kerou is a Certified Holistic Health Coach based in Santa Monica specializing in datingcoaching. She is available for private coaching sessions, email antheakerou@gmail.com. Alternatively, visit heartfacewellness.com or facebook.com/heartfacewellness for more information.

• Do you have a dating question you would like answered? Email your question to editor@smmirror.com.

in News
Related Posts

Edify TV: Residents Frustrated With Local Country Club

January 25, 2021

January 25, 2021

Westside residents living near one of the most exclusive LA county clubs have a bone to pick in this video...

SMMUSD Study Session Outlines Potential Campus Upgrades: Santa Monica Beat – January, 25, 2021

January 25, 2021

January 25, 2021

Local news and culture in under 5 minutes. * SMMUSD Study Session Outlines Potential Campus Upgrades * First Baptist Church...

Body Found in Santa Monica Beachside Gazebo

January 25, 2021

January 25, 2021

Man found in Ocean Avenue gazebo Saturday By Sam Catanzaro A body was found in a gazebo near the beach...

Edify TV: Affordable Senior Housing Rises in Westside Neighborhood

January 24, 2021

January 24, 2021

A four-story senior affordable housing project is rising in a Westside neighborhood. Learn more in this video made possible by...

SMa.r.t. Column: Saving a Failed Marriage – Part 2

January 22, 2021

January 22, 2021

Every 8 years, the state requires cities to update their planning code’s “housing element” to reflect the number of dwelling...

Rise of The Digital Nomads Changing The Way We Rent?

January 22, 2021

January 22, 2021

Today on Westside Real Estate Show* Matt Damon Lists Palisades home for $21 Million.* Rise of The Digital Nomads Changing...

Edify TV: COVID-19 Outbreak at Santa Monica Government Office

January 21, 2021

January 21, 2021

Over a dozen employees have tested positive for COVID-19 at a Santa Monica government building since January 1. Learn more...

Santa Monica Students Receive 2021 Education Awards from The Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Westside Coalition

January 21, 2021

January 21, 2021

Seven area students were presented Education Awards by The Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Westside Coalition at the first-ever...

Santa Monica New Roads Graduate Amanda Gorman Shines At Inauguration: Santa Monica Beat – January, 21, 2021

January 21, 2021

January 21, 2021

Local news and culture in under 5 minutes. * Santa Monica New Roads Graduate Amanda Gorman Shines At Inauguration *...

Edify TV: Promenade Property Owner Frustrated With Homelessness

January 21, 2021

January 21, 2021

A Third Street Promenade property owner is calling Santa Monica officials to deal with the issue of homeless individuals sleeping...

65-Year-Old Santa Monica Pastry Shop Closes

January 21, 2021

January 21, 2021

Westside Food Scene January 21, 2021 By Kerry Slater Santa Monica Pastry Shop Closes  A beloved Santa Monica pastry shop...

Brian Dennehy Stars In The Tender DRIVEWAYS – His Final Film

January 21, 2021

January 21, 2021

What makes DRIVEWAYS particularly poignant is that it was Brian Dennehy’s last film before he died and his cinematic presence...

Free COVID-19 Antibody Testing in Santa Monica

January 20, 2021

January 20, 2021

Calvary Baptist Church on 20th Street, 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. A Santa Monica church is doing free COVID-19 antibody...

FDA-Authorized Coronavirus Testing at Santa Monica’s Shore Hotel

January 20, 2021

January 20, 2021

Drive-thru and walk-up testing seven-days a week   The award-winning Shore Hotel, located steps away from the world-famous Santa Monica Pier,...