January 12, 2026
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CHECK PLEASE!:

ARROGANT HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER wishes to test you on every level. I am a proud and brilliant dork. I dress to shock and distract you. I drive my grandfather’s beat-up old convertible and I will take you through dangerous parts of town in it. I like to use the ladies room in restaurants and I pass gas without apology. You must be well read, well-traveled, gorgeous, funny and not easily shocked. Let’s get together and see if you can pass my final exam.

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SM.a.r.t. Column: Vote

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