By CHARLES ANDREWS
I HAD IT
20/20 was how they used to measure it when I was a kid in school. If you measured 20/15 or 20/10 – whoa, bragging rights on the playground. Of course, none of us gave a thought to how that made the visually less than perfect feel.
I was still 20/20 until college, until the day some Albuquerque High School kid mimicking his parents’ politics (and quite possibly an ROTC student, even more entrenched), picked up a rock bigger than his hand and hurled it as high as he could at the university students marching to the Federal Building to protest the Vietnam War. It was such a mighty heave it went straight over their heads and hit me square in the right eye, as I was standing on the sidewalk opposite, reporting for the student newspaper. Bye-bye 20/20.
I lost 50% of the sight in that eye, and even though the loss of depth perception ruined my pool and ping pong prowess, I considered it only a minor annoyance. When driving, I would always check to my right much more thoroughly than my left. Always aware of it.
WHO KNEW
It would bite me, hard, more than half a century later. I developed Macular Degeneration, but it was insignificant for about nine years. Then up pops a little rascal called Geographic Atrophy, a growing pinpoint hole in the retina which dims your vision and takes away the central image, and is unstoppable. No surgery or drugs help, no cure. Finally, a drug was tested that slows it down 20% – I’ll take it! – but that requires an injection into the eye every six weeks. There, I just ruined your lunch, too bad.
But here’s the kicker. That GA showed up in my good eye. If it had hit my right eye, who cares? I don’t use it that much anyway, for years. But no, take my good eye instead and leave me blind. Proving there is a God, and She has a sense of humor. A dark sense of humor, if you will.
But wait! Good news. Technology may kill us all, but sometimes it saves us.
IT’S A MIRACLE
It’s called Maggie Vision, it’s a one-pound wearable plastic headset with space for an iPhone 16 or 17 to be inserted in front, so you are looking through the iPhone lens when you use it. The phone is loaded with software that performs the magic. I can’t explain it to you scientifically, but who cares, it works. The person who developed it, Elizabeth Evans, could explain it. She lives in Arizona and was kind enough to pay a personal visit when I was in Tempe for a family Thanksgiving. She said there already were headsets using Android phones, but she thought the Apple technology would work much better. Thank you, Elizabeth.
I had been unable to read for a few years, without awkwardly holding up my phone with one hand, using the magnifier and maybe the flashlight if it wasn’t very light out. You can imagine that this is a problem for a writer. The things I used to do in seconds now took 10 or 20 times longer. It’s a good thing I’m a patient man.
Also, because I’m slowly growing into how I can best use it, letting me read again is a blessing, but reading and typing at the same time is a different beast. You can’t easily glance back and forth between keyboard and copy. This is complicated by the fact that I am one of the world’s worst typists. I use voice a lot on my phone, but I think I am going to have to go that route even more on my laptop.
DUDAMEL, HOOPS AND OPERA
Now there is the instant reward. Gustavo Dudamel had become this shadowy figure atop the podium, and I had forgotten how much it adds to a performance to clearly see his face and hands, simultaneously directing and absorbing the music. The same for opera, to be able to see faces singing and acting, and the striking costumes and sets. I was just about to give up on live basketball; sometimes, I couldn’t tell which team had the ball. The software allows adjustments on the headset, while wearing it, for contrast, color, and magnification up to 20x.
It’s not inexpensive. $3800 including the iPhone, $1000 less without. But look what you are getting. And if you are a veteran like me – $0. I’ll tell you more about Miracle Maggie in another column, but if anyone is interested, you can write to my email below. The future’s looking bright.
PUBLIC SERVICE REMINDER, MARK CALENDARS
The next NO KINGS DAY resistance gathering is March 28, locally in Palisades Park, north end, with Ocean Ave. closed off. See you there. There’s no question that democracy and our freedoms, rapidly diminishing, are on the line. This depends on every one of us. It’s 1776 again. We have seen that when we push back sufficiently, the demagogues back down. Last time we had 7 million people take to the streets. We need to triple that number this time.
Build on the ashes. Keep hope alive. The future’s so bright I have to wear shades. And SHOW UP FOR NO KINGS DAY!!!
Charles Andrews has lived in Santa Monica for 40 years and wouldn’t live anywhere else in the world. Really. Send love and/or rebuke to him at therealmrmusic@gmail.com
