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Wax On, Wax Off

It’s summer. Bathing suit weather. So much prep for this. Getting waxed, losing a few pounds, getting a believable fake tan, finding the perfect slimming (one piece) black swimsuit with a sexy cover-up (that covers the jelly-belly that I’m trying to get rid of), matching sandals and tote, and getting the tinted super-sunscreen out. (I think I’m reading too many Glamour Magazine online stories.)

Back to the beginning. Last week, I went to get a bikini wax and an eyebrow wax. It’s at a place off of 2nd Street and Arizona Avenue, where a bunch of beauty-oriented businesses co-exist in a shared space. It’s actually pretty cool; you could go from room to room. One room, a haircut, the next room, fake eyelashes, the next room a mani/pedi, and so on. 

For this visit I only wanted the wax. I’ve been there before, but not for a while. I checked in and was lead to a well-lit room with a full-length table, upbeat music playing in the background. The aesthetician was sweet and kind. She asked to get up on the table. As I did, I described to her the kind of bikini wax I envisioned. The result would be a little more that a typical wax that just took off a little hair on the sides so that nothing would be jutting out of the crotch of my bikini. (Eew, what a visual).

She nodded, understanding my request. She got to work. So, for all of you out there that have not had a bikini wax, it’s not for the shy of heart. You’re literally laying in a position you’d be in if you went to your gynecologist for a PAP smear, but for much longer. And it doesn’t tickle.

We start to have some small talk while she’s waxing. (What else can you do?) The first waxing strip goes on. Then RIP! The waxing strip is yanked off, along with my hair. Stings a little. Well, a lot. This wax-on, wax-off activity goes on for a while, about 15 minutes. I go through a lot of temporary pain, but it’s worth it. And it only stings for a minute or two. One more strip of wax applied and ripped off and I’m done. Thank goodness.

I quickly put my clothes on, paid for the service and went home. Just so you know, there are different types of bikini waxes. One just removes the hair on the sides, right near your bikini line. One goes a little further, leaving a cute little strip of hair down the middle (that’s the one I asked for.) Then there is a little more extreme wax. It’s waxing the entire pubic area, called a Brazilian Wax. 

Guess what? I got home, and I am getting ready for my shower. I passed by my full-length the mirror, naked. You know the kid from the movie Home Alone who screams in the mirror when he shaves his beard (that he never had)? His face and scream were classic. Well, that was me when I found out that the aesthetician gave me a full-out Brazilian wax! 

 Completely bare. I saw my face turn red with embarrassment and shock. I calmed down and tried to make the best of it. For one, I will never have any bikini hair showing. That’s a given. Second, it will be a long time before I need another waxing. Third, the wax will be much easier next time since I will have a small amount of hair growth.

Don’t get me wrong. I love what a good wax does for a bikini line. But when you go to get yours, maybe you can draw a picture of what you want! Happy summer.

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